A Nightmare I Don't Want To Wake Up From
by Love-LeoxRaph-Rage
Summary: Its been 6 years since L died, and Lights still coping... but what happens when Light starts getting visits from L's ghost? And why is Light happy to see his rival? More importantly, why wont L talk! Read and find out!


**Anime: Death Note**

**Pairing: LxLight**

**Rating: M!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own L, Misa, Light or Death Note!**

**A/N: Heeeeeeey I haven't really done any DN yaoi in a while so I thought I'd write some, hope you like it! (This is the edited version fyi!) **

Its nearly been 6 years since L died... and each day of the anniversary of his death, I take that day off. Because on that very day, I see him. I don't feel him or hear him, but I see him. Whats strange is, I like it. I see him and I think I smell him too! I smell the sweet smell of sweets when I see him, he's always doing the same thing, staring out a window, in that same awkward position and biting his or he's just staring at the floor, but he's always around, the first year I freaked out a bit (strange since I'm used to Ryuk but a guy I killed a whole year ago, that I SAW die was pretty weird.)

But no one else sees him. Figures. I always give Misa excuses as to why I need to be alone, but she always gives me I think her shinigami eyes aren't worth what she does. And I know I can get rid of her, I could always write her name, but I don't dare raise suspicion. So until the time comes, she will stay for when I'm alone with L... were sometimes quiet. I might ask a few things, but he just stares at me for a moment then look away. His pale soft lips move but nothing ever comes out. It's slightly painful, I don't get to hear his voice, but I'm taunted with that look.

I never get a good at his eyes but I'm scared to see them. The last time I saw those eyes they were going dim, those black orbs were darkening incredibly and going blank, and I finally saw him close his eyes. Even while we were fighting he didn't blink once. Creepy but still slightly awe struck was now, Misa's thankfully at her modeling shoots that usually take 5-8 hours... and that's just to finish the shoot, she's in Russia so that gives me a day or 2... thank God (or me).So now I turn, in my private room, to see my old friend staring at the gray foggy sky. I lay on my bed and turn to look at him.

" L." I say to test if he'll look my way. And he does. He turns his head my way and I mentally smile, and make note of this.

" Ryuzaki I mean, are you really here or are you my over active imagination?" I truly wonder this if my sub conscious dreamed him up. He stays looking at me then his lips move, and I can read them after practicing.

_'Why would __**YOU**__ dream of __**ME**__ Light-kun? Is it because we had sexual inter-course-"_ I feel my face heat up and burst out

"H-Hey! D-Don't bring up the dead past!" I realize I should've been more careful with my words, but he just stops moving his lips. I worry that he might leave early, but instead he stands. Which is a first in all these years. He walked closer, well sorta. His feet didn't touch the ground but his legs still motioned as he came closer, his eyes still hiding under the sharp strands of hair Ryuzaki once had but now is just a memory, a dream, a nightmare.

"Ryuzaki? Are you... ok?" I sighed as that was the kind of question Misa or Sayu would ask a dead person they were worried about. I looked on the bed and remembered when we shared a bed. And what happened along those nights... well its a bit painful to remember, but this brings back that first night. Slightly... when L was depressed, about his mother if I remember right...I look up and he's right above me, my breath catches. _'T-This isn't good... he's not real, he's gone, and the last thing he'd do is fuck you much less forgive you!'_ I try to reason with my self, try not to feel like a necrophiliac but its just such a rush to think of what possible things we could do...

"Light-_kun_~" That voice, it sounds so pure, and so familiar, I stare at the man who had been the only person to be on the same level as me and actually make me think. I feel my self getting turned on already and feeling myself get hard.

"Y-Yes Ryuzaki?" I say damning my self for stuttering! He smiles and I see a twinkle, he lifts his head and his eyes...There bright blue, there BLUE. I had no idea! I thought they were a really dark black, but they did seem grayish black... can someone get blue to black eyes? Contacts? He probably did have bad vision from sitting so close to computer screens all day but-

"Ah Light-kun, you finally ask the one thing I've been wanting, and directly to me, every year you always tell me to go away, or why am I here, never if I'm ok... however childish it may sound, the dead still have feelings... Light-kun~" That tone he had when he said my name made my spine tingle, why the hell am I getting turned on by him? Is it because I'm always surrounded by death? What is with me? Is this even real, have I gone insane?... Wouldn't doubt it but with Death Gods, why can't there be ghosts? I take a sharp intake of breath before saying

"L, are you really here? Am I crazy (in love), or am I really seeing you, because if I am, then... t-then I need to tell you I'm so sorry. Please, you have to understand this was for the greater good! For justice!" L put one of his long skinny fingers on my lip that made me dead quiet... again bad choice of the finger felt cold. Ice cold. It was cold enough to make me gasp and with that he leaned lower, his back already bent up as it is, he smiled still and removed his hand and putting it in his pocket. He stared down at me, and I was spread out across the bed."

R-Ryuzaki you didn't answer me, please I need to know are you-" I didn't get to finish as said ex-detective said in a breathy voice (even though he didn't breath)

"Why would you need to know Light-kun? What good would it do? What if I am a illusion, would that make you feel better? And if I'm not, but simply a ghost, what that make you feel better? Which would you prefer?" I blink at how blunt he is, but he was always blunt, wasn't he? I feel some anger rise, some old rivalry spite. I lift myself up so where about nose to nose and I feel the freezing chill around him brush onto me. But I held a steady gaze with those pure aqua eyes and said in a confident tone

"Well it'd be better if you didn't just tell me what I wanted to hear!" And as soon as I said that his smile turned into a quirky smirk. Not always a good sign, it mainly means I must've lost.

"Well isn't that what you always get? You get told what you want to hear, Kiraaaaaaa-sama~" I feel my self harden to the point its almost noticeable. I try to keep the blush from crawling up my face and say keeping myself from stuttering

"That is not true! I earn the compliments I get, but none matter if they come from someone with a grade point average of a child! And what's with the whole _'Kira-__**sama'**_! I know you know I'm Kira, but are you after revenge?" I could feel the fear and slight resentment rise in me, churning away at me. He stared, with a blank expression, he stiffened ever so slightly and his blasted bangs feel over those eyes once again! We both stayed silent, our faces still close enough for Ryuzaki to smell my breath, and as I was about to apologize I felt a hand reach up and cup my face, but it wasn't as cold... I leaned into it, even if it was still cold.

"L..." I heard a soft chuckle and looked up to find those eyes, those brilliant blue eyes, but they were shimmering. His chuckling was slightly dark but joyful.

"Light, I do not want any sort of revenge, I just want to feel again, I want you for one more night. But I need you to confess, everything, your feelings and you sins. Then we can relive that night we did so long ago, can you do that Light?" I stared a few more seconds and nodded, wondering what the hell made him say that all of the sudden.

"Well... L, I did kill you and thousands of others, I am Kira, I am manipulating the Task Force and Misa, I actually tricked Rem into killing you, and Misa is the second Kir-"

"YOUR sins Light, not Misa's." I blinked but nodded again. I told him I was Kira and that I killed him, why was that easy but telling him my feelings are not? I held my breath and said quickly

"IloveyouLIalwayshave!" I closed my eyes and sat straight waiting for his response. Please don't laugh though, please oh God please...I felt my heart drop when that freezing yet calming hand left my cheek... but yelped when I felt myself sacked. I looked up and saw a smiling L, and for some reason, he felt... warm? How did he go from freezing ice to warm? And why does he feel so... real? I saw this man die in my arms and burried at a grave site with my own two eyes!How is this possible?

"Light. You did it, now we can proceed..." I felt a hand crawling up my shirt and pinching my perked nipples making me hiss"Ah ahh R-Ryuzaki..." I moaned as he bit my neck slowly and whispered against it barely enough for me to hear it "Call me Lawliet, Light... it's my real name, it doesn't matter now but please, call me Lawliet..." I feel my heart beating against my chest faster with each passing minute.

"L-La-Lawliet!" He pinched harder and I arched my back into it, enjoying the sudden rush of pain and excitement back into my life, with the work and stress all drifting away.

"Mhh it's so nice to hear you say my name Light-kun... you have no idea how much I wished for you to moan my name..." I feel my whole body heat up and wrap my arms around his torso while trying to control my works those magic fingers on my nipples while nipping along side my neck to jaw line, I start breathing harder and pulling his hair. I grip it tightly and start savagely kissing and licking along his neck, while all those pent up emotions over the years all start flowing through me at once.

"Ryu- I mean Lawliet! I n-need more, soo much more, p-please!" I hear him laugh softly and glare half heartedly at him."And you will get more, my God~" I arch more into him, my member bulging in my pants begging for it to be touched. L quickly undoes my zipper and pulls my pants to my ankles.

"Lawliet, oh God please Lawliet! I need you so bad, please just do something!" He kisses me and I hush while his tongue massages my lower limp and running the tips of his fingers over my erection.I whimper causing me and squeeze.

"O-Oi! L-L! Please don't tease!" I bit his tongue and again I was squeezed. I groaned while arching again, I slightly enjoyed it. snaked his hand inside my boxers and stared at me and smiled

"I love you Light-kun, and I forgive you. Just try to forgive me, and forgive this nightmare." I go wide eyed at what I heard... L said he LOVES me...ME! And what nightmare? This is a dream come true! Unless... is this a dream?

"W-What do you-ah! M-Me-mean Lawliet?" I hiss and moan feeling him circling my penis. I arch into his touch but one hand goes to my thigh holding it kisses me softly and says

"When were done, you will never see me, and this will all seem like a dream..." I feel my eyes stinging close my eyes.

"W-Why?" I wrap my arms around him and crush my lips against those soft, pure, white lips. I savor the taste while after lack of oxygen I pull back panting and he doesn't miss a beat saying

"Because as a angel, I am not allowed to do this or be with you. But that doesn't matter, all that matters is... this~" he goes down and licks the tip causing me to moan deeply.

"Ahh ooooo fuck! Lawliet! Ahh Go, God, God, GOD!" He repeats this motion and he starts taking it fully, he stops and that causes me to whine, even to my Lawliets right, it doesn't matter now, all that matters is me and him. And this. He pulls my boxers all the way down and slides his self oh so delicately in and I hiss in pain and enjoyment. I was about to yell until he gently started kissing me and stroking my cock quickly and passionately.

"Be patient Light-kun, you will enjoy this, I swear." I barely hear his voice, but it sounds like bells chiming in my ears. I start breathing harder and that increases his movements, slamming in and out of my prostate until he finally finds it, my sweet is nothing like when Misa and I are having sex, I usually let her just ride me until she's done, or just let her suck my cock. I don't really get any fulfillment from it but Oh GOD now I truly feel complete!

"L-L! I-I might be.. oh ohhh ahh Lawliet!" I yell his name as he slams harder, faster, the bed board shakes and squeaks, his panting and muscles flexing, I grab his shoulders and sit in his lap bouncing up and down moaning and start sucking on his softly moans and I can't stand not hearing more of those sounds so I bite them slightly hard earning a moan and yelp. I smirk but gasp as he throws me on the ground, fucking me harder!

He pushes harder and harder while holding my hips down, he's sweating and I'm panting so hard, I lick up his chest while he licks my ear lobe and I feel the pressure building up more and more and I grab my cock and start pumping. Thank God I have my shirt still on half buttoned up since where rubbing so fast against the carpet I might've gotten rug bur, but damn its worth it when your being fucked into oblivion!

"L-L, oh God L I think I-I'm gonna- I'm g-gonna **c-c-cum**!" I try holding on as he whispers in a husky tone

"Cum then, then I will too." I feel the heat of the moment and cum right then and there and he pushes me on my back and slams into me while bending down licking my penis of its cum. He tries to take it all and almost succeeds more than humanly possible. I make some intelligible sounds and yell his name with all of my vocals combined and he whispers mine in the sweetest tone, I shut my eyes and yell

"_**LAWLIET**_!"

"_**Light-kuuuuuuuuuun**_~!"I feel myself filled up and leaking, it feels so right and _soooo_ _gooooooooooood_...I feel my self getting tired and he cups my face, his hands getting colder, and smiles, his eyes still visible barely over those onyx colored bangs. I smile and he kisses me softly and I feel a little wet drop fall on my cheek. I look up and see blood forming in L's eyes and my eyes snap open in horror. He's smiling a sad smile and closes his eyes, those blue blood stained eyes.

"L-Lawliet?" I say scared to see what happens next. What the hell is going on?

"... Light-kun. I love you, and I'll see you soon..." his voice cracks and more bloody tears fall and I feel some running down my cheeks. I embrace him tightly and mumble

"I don't want to say good bye" "This isn't good bye, its just fare well for now..." I feel him getting colder by the second. I let go and he's glowing bright, he smiles and then a bright flash and everything goes white. I feel myself falling into a deep sleep...When I awoke I saw I was still on the floor, still half dressed but Misa was... in between my legs, and white cum on her lower lip. She was fast asleep on my thigh. I shifted and she awoke suddenly

"Oh _Light-kuuun_!~" she said in a singy songy voice that pierced threw my ears.

"Yeah Misa? What er happened...?" she smirked deviously and said in a seductive voice

"Well... I saw you on the floor, and that you had a _'problem'_ and decided to help you! Hehehe I think you were half asleep though! But mhhh _Light-kuuuun~"_ she pushed her breasts up out of her very, very small shirt and said leaning over my exposed member

"It was _verrrrrrrry _good~ May Misa Misa have seconds?" I was about to say no when I suddenly thought of L. I sighed and shook my head,

"No, I'm sorry my dream just kinda... freaked me out." She pouted but sighed and kissed my thigh getting up. She only had that very, very, very, small shirt on and she had... no underwear. I just shook it off and went towards the shower, but she asked before I closed the door

"Light-kun? Did you have a nightmare about someone named La- la lite?" I stare at her and then turn around feeling incredible sadness overwhelm me. I decide to answer her with something complex so I say the truth.

"Kinda, I woke up from a nightmare I _didn't _want to wake up from..." I closed the door leaving that dumb bimbo wondering what the hell I just said and got in the shower washing off everything, everything that is except the scent of strawberries... strawberries I remember a certain detective loved...

_**~THE END~ **_

**A/N: **_Yeaaaaaah I decided to do a DN yaoi thing since its been a while xD Hope you liked it! Byyyyye byyyyyyye, don't forget to review! _


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